Glory Days

Sleepless nights

2011-11-25T00:34:00.001+01:00

So, having lost my beloved camera I'm spending my nights roaming the net looking for a new one.

My old camera was an Olympus PEN E-PL1 and now I'm thinking of upgrading to an E-PL2. Any input? I love the retro looks of them and think the PL2 should be a good upgrade.

So, hello sleepless nights. It was so much easier to go to sleep at night not wondering what's out there...

Party button?

2011-10-28T00:05:00.001+02:00

What would happen if, instead of switching off the lights, I'd push that identical button instead? The lights would dim and I would have a bar in my hotel room? Music, people, socializing? I'd be happy if only a glass of red would appear.. Don't dare pushing it though.

Travel snack

2011-10-27T09:57:00.001+02:00

On the Termini train station going to Salerno. We're in our busiest period at work, with 12 store openings in 4 weeks. Divided between two stressed-out merchandisers. You do the math.

Anyway, on my way to Salerno, close to Napoli in the south of Italy. The only thing i know about Salerno is that they produce good wine, the Salice Salentino and the Negroamaro. Yum.

Since I was fashionably early for my train (there is no such thing as fashionably late when you're traveling- you arrive on time and look great or you arrive late, all messed up and sweaty and you have most likely already missed your train) I figured I'd get myself some breakfast for the train ride. Enter the classic Italian breakfast bar. Cappuccino to go, orange juice in bottle and then..? Something to eat. Basically this is how one gets fat in Italy. The choice of breakfast snack is immense and the one is sweeter than the other. Even the least unhealthy one, the wholewheat croissant, has honey in it and there is no way you can get it without.

So, I just go with the flow, accept my destiny and let myself enjoy the sugar rush.

Buongiorno a voi!

Mental home decoration

2011-10-20T22:49:00.005+02:00

..Mental because it's only in my mind and mental also because I feel I'm going mental only focusing on different furniture, styles, brands, ideas and themes.

My keywords for the new place, hoping it will be the one I've already looked at, are space efficient, light, economic and elegant- but still personal. It's hard, only looking at options for apartments I realize they rarely build them the way I'd prefer. Often I look at small rooms with limited daylight, small windows and horrible colour schemes. And, what I wouldn't give to get a balcony!

The ideal situation would be renting unfurnised but unfortunately I'm not made of money. Getting all the stuff from Ikea (the only option here in Italy for normal-priced furniture that doesn't look like it's been owned by people who are now dead of old age) would set me back at least €1000, easily.

So, hunting around for inspiration, as an attempt to focus on beautiful things and to recharge on positive energy. Still a little under the weather (and under a ***tful amount of work related stress) but focusing right now on the upcoming weekend. Lots of time to drift away in thoughts on the perfect kitchen table or bedside lamp!

Here are some of my favourite things currently in my Evernote inspiration folder! Enjoy!

Source: http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_WQSqGHVHmQo/TOpbmFcl74I/AAAAAAAAGO0/KA6aRwlAn1U/s1600/DSCF2417.jpg

Source: http://parisapartment.wordpress.com/page/3/

Kartell Bourgie lamp

Flos Skygarden lamp

Bad conscience

2011-10-18T21:48:00.003+02:00

Hi all,

I am truly sorry for my lack of posts since July. I know it's been two months of silence.

Well, let me tell you; so much has been going on. Work, as always, super hectic and super much. Plus, vacation times, change of seasons (fashionally speaking), after summer stress, autumn cold and a certain gloominess... Plus, I have started looking for a new place to live as my neighbours are driving me insane. So, I am actually looking forward to counting in 2012 in a new apartment with Ikea boxes all around me! Keep your fingers crossed, I might just have found the place!

Will keep you posted. I promise you. I will update and tell you all. Right now, I need to sleep as I had a meltdown at work today after suffering this cold for weeks. Left early and tucked myself underneath the sheets for the rest of the day.

Good night!

July 2011 so far

2011-07-19T00:58:00.002+02:00

Florence

Florence

Padova

Paris, Cafe Delaville

Birthday celebration 30th birthday, Rome

The Florentine wedding bliss

2011-07-18T21:13:00.003+02:00

Ceremony at Palazzo Vecchio in Florence, held by the Florentine mayor. Rice throwing and cheering in Piazza della Signoria. Reception dinner and party in the Tuscan countryside. A six-course rustic dinner and locally produced wine while looking over the green hills, then on for dancing until the sun rose again.

Fantastic.

Birthday gift!

2011-07-18T21:05:00.003+02:00

Just bought this lovely wrap bracelet for myself for my 30th birthday! Very happy, excited for when it arrives. It's from House of Harlow, Nicole Richie's company, and is made of 14ct gold and black leather. I hope I will like it. I'm having it sent from the UK to my parents' house where I am going to celebrate my birthday with my closest friends and family.

2011-07-10T21:00:00.002+02:00

Extremely inspiring short movie.

Never been a huge Beyonce fan but really, this woman is amazing.

Surprise gift!

2011-05-17T22:30:00.006+02:00

You know sometimes when you are waiting for a gift. You know it's in the mail because the person in the other end has given you the heads up. Everyday is like Christmas morning when you get home, hoping that bulky envelope will be waiting for you by the mailbox.

This has been my everyday since I got back from Sweden at Easter. I got the heads up from my friend in New York who said he'd found a perfect gift for me, about a month ago. Everyday since I have been eagerly waiting for that gift to arrive. Last week I thought I'd write him to tell him that some sneaky neighbour must have stole it since it hadn't arrived. And then, today it did.

Such a surprise, on my way home from the supermarket I bumped in to the signora who runs the downstairs coffeeshop. She asked me for my name and said the mailman had dropped it off today since the envelope was too large to fit in the small mailbox. She said they thought it could be me. I thought it was very sweet of them to think of me.

I unwrapped it as soon as I got in the door. It was the most sweet book ever. A children's book about Rome! With water colour paintings inside and the dearest little texts to make them company. It's like a guide book for small children but it's very clever. It made me very happy to know that he knows me that well, my old friend.
(Click on the photos to make them larger)

By the same author there are also the earlier books "This is Paris" and "This is London". This book was originally created in 1960 but has not been published until recently. The author's name is Miroslav Sasek.

I can highly recommend them for cute reading and extraordinary paintings!

Good night peeps!
Tomorrow I'm off to Veneto, the area surrounding Venice. We are opening a store in Portogruaro next week and I have to go and have a look!
Exciting!

Sunday lazy

2011-05-15T12:54:00.008+02:00

Lazy Sundays. You either love them or hate them. I usually don't like them, they make me anxious of the coming week and instead of being all chill about it I stress.

So today I thought I'd do differently.

After listening to crazy smoking lady cleaning her house and smelling the fried garlic my Chinese neighbour family was having for breakfast I decided to escape the house. Put on my new fancy jacket from Zara (love Klein blue, just discovered it's my colour!), took computer under the arm and headed out in to the sunshine. Went to my fave bar on the corner of Piazza San Giovanni in Laterano, just a stone's throw from my house, and had caffé latte and a small croissant for breakfast.

I also wrote a few emails and tapped away on my MacJournal (like a diary program). Got a few looks from passerbys (is that how you write it or did I just make that word up?), I think it looked funny hawking over my computer screen in sunlight in the middle of the street. Whatever. Or, I looked extremely handsome in my new jacket!
Woop!

I eventually had to switch sides of the table as you can see, I was almost getting sunburnt on one side only. The difficulties of everyday life, haha. Soon I'm off to lunch with my friend Melina. We have found this nice little trattoria down the street from my house, basically 20 meters from the Colosseum. I always throught it was a classic tourist trap but passing by it one evening I realized it was almost only Italian people eating there! So, we tried it and we really liked it. Classic rustic Italian food and friendly service and cheap prices. How great!

Last week I was out and about for most of the days. After an extremely nice weekend by the sea I was well rested and super motivated.

BBQ at a friend's roof terrace, watching a game of soccer of course

The beach in Maccarese, the Roman coast

Lunch in Maccarese, spaghetti alle vongole and a glass of white wine with a couple of friends

Lunch in Fregene, always the spaghetti alle vongole and a crips glass of white wine

The summer campaign is in all stores now and bikinis are flying out quicker than we can get them in. It's so nice to be a part of all this! Bikinis for the people! We popped over to lovely Torino, in the north west. Such a nice little city, super lovely and very pretty. It also had a Swedish calm to it, in the evening the streets were empty and silent. It was lovely for a change but I think I'd go crazy after a week.

My colleague took me to a Sicilian restaurant (he promised me the Torinese food was more winterish and rustic and not ideal for the warm spring evening we had) and we had great seafood and even greater wine. The waitor had to explain the whole menu for us since it was written in Sicilian accent. It was a fun experience though, and a little bit of practice for when I have to go there!

The day after we were visiting shops in the area and then we spent the evening in Milano. Oh Milano, how I adore you. We found a small bar, from the outside it looked like a student bar but inside they had a small garden where we had great aperitivo with a huge buffet of nibbles and pasta and cheese to eat. How nice. Then dinner at The Kitchen, a legendary Italian restaurant run by Chinese people. It was super good and apparently very popular since the terrace was full!

The spring is finally here now and the days are long, warm and lovely. I'm getting more into Rome mode and I am actually beginning to like this town. Slowly slowly.

What have you been up to lately?Is it springtime yet, wherever you are?

Wedding season

2011-04-30T13:14:00.006+02:00

My friend recevied the funniest invitation ever. Ordinary white paper. Two stickers on the front page. Drawing by hand (yes, by a grown up, not a kid as I first suspected) with a gold pen. And a request that asks guests to show up half an hour early so the wedding can start on time.

Me, on the other hand, received a very delightful and classic invitation. Thick cream paper, dark navy font. A separate RSVP card. Silk bow.

So strange how different people do things in different ways.

Cougar Town inspiration

2011-04-30T02:03:00.005+02:00

Hi peeps,

just got back to Rome after a few days in Milano. Summer is almost here and I feel the urge for summer shoes! The shop windows are filled with them but I kind of have an idea of what kind of wedge sandal I'm after..

Usually not the customer for wedges but after having destroyed numerous of heels in the cobblestone hell of Rome I realize I will need a good pair if I want to make it around the city with dignity. Brown. Simple. Soft leather. Timeless design.

Then I saw them. Watching the new episode of Cougar Town Jules is trading her shoes for a t-shirt of Bobby. Long story. However. There they were.

Courtesy of ABC Network

YSL Cruise collection! I think they look so comfortable although they are crazy high. Call me silly but knowing the last of the YSL shoes I know they will be comfortable no matter the height of the heel. Now, if these would have been Zara shoes I think I mentally already would have broken both my ankles.

Now the hunt has begun.. Will keep you posted.

Sweet dreams! At least I know what I'll be dreaming of!

Milano!

2011-03-31T23:02:00.004+02:00

I just came back to Rome after a quick two-day trip across Italy.

I went to check on a future store opening and then I went to Milan in the evening. A brisk walk to the hotel and then out for late dinner and drinks with one of my best friends from Florence- Tommy.

We had dinner at a small Abruzzese restaurant (L'angolo d'Abruzzo) where I among other things had to try the "wet mozzarella", a semi dissolved mozzarella which tasted mainly of creamy milk. The sensation was not so much of the taste but more of the weird wetness (almost perverse I have to say, it even made me blush)! We had booked the table based on a tip from a guy working for Tom Ford. I had hoped to see Tom there but I guess he's to gorgeous to frequent places where ordinary people go. :)

Then drinks at a local trendy gay bar, Mono, where we met the Italian Ryan Gosling! He looked just like him, just not as tall (after all, he was Italian). Gorgeous. It was his birthday and we celebrated by having him buy us shots, haha.

Great evening with a great friend. We always laugh our heads off together.

Also, I have to say, I think I picked the wrong city. I don't feel at home in Rome, the city is beautiful but it's hard to live a modern life in an ancient city. It's like living in an open space museum. And the smell. Gee. And the public transport. Milano on the other hand, it was like an Italian Sweden. Wide streets, fresh air, open spaces, friendly people and quick traffic. Darn.

Photos from my new life in Rome!

2011-03-17T23:21:00.008+01:00

Change of routines

2010-05-13T00:34:00.001+02:00

Sitting here, two steps from your door, hoping you won't appear. On my
way home from a chaotic evening and I'm not in my right mind to see you.

I loathe the fact that we live in the same city. I hate that our roads
entwine. I hate that you stepped on these cobblestones proabably
minutes before I did. I wish I didn't have to walk where you walk, be
where you are, see what you see.

I'm changing cities. I need to get out from under your shadow, need to
find a place where it's all not connected to you. I need a place which
doesn't make me think of you. I'm leaving. So tired of this.

Sent via my iPhone

2010-03-15T22:52:00.003+01:00

All I can conclude from my last attempt of meeting someone good, nice, sweet, caring and normal is...
..
..Never, I mean, never, date an architect.
When things go bad the whole city he's working in is a minefield of emotions. Just seeing one of his buildings, or one that reminds you of one he's done, makes you want to quit it all.
Paranoid perhaps, but today they were taunting me. And I felt silly.

It wasn't worth it. Those initial sweet moments that I wanted could last forever, they only make me feel even more stupid, even more silly and they make me question everything.

And now, when I try to get myself back up again he sweeps right in and shits all over what's left of me.

Mostly, I'm disappointed in myself for being so sweeped off my feet.

This one will take time to bounce back from. But I know that once I do, I'll be stronger than before.

Wild hearts..

2010-02-15T23:09:00.003+01:00

He has updated his Facebook status for the first time since the end of November- just days before the nightmare began. Two days ago he wrote " Sono l'uomo più fortunato al mondo" which means "I'm the luckiest guy in the world". I wanted to vomit. I know he moved on and that I am just a fading bad memory he'd wish to erase. But still.

When is it enough for two people not to be friends anymore? How much does it need to hurt?

Just waiting for my latest broken heart to heal, just waiting for that day when it will stop hurting, when my heart won't skip a beat when I get a text message. I don't think I was well enough to meet someone new, and especially not ready to have my heart broken a second time.

2010-02-15T22:49:00.002+01:00

A friend shared this song with me a couple of days ago. She said she'd thought of me.

I absolutely love it but I can't stop listening to it now.

Bracelets!

2010-02-15T21:23:00.001+01:00

Look at these lovely stud bracelets I got the other day! Gold and silver studs and snap buttons! They come in five different colours but I had a hard time finding any as they were almost sold out already!

Only 1,95 Euro, at an H&M Kids' department near you!

Time heals all wounds?

2010-02-02T18:58:00.001+01:00

My MacBook Pro needed service so I had to leave him away to the Apple
people. I realize how incredibly addicted I am to it, how my entired
private life is revolving around it. Shows, movies, music, social
life, blogs, inspiration..

Anyways.

My latest fling turned out to be another disappointment. Almost three
weeks without a word have passed and not a day goes by without my
wondering of his whereabouts. In a way this has been more difficult
for me to accept, especially given the fact that we live in the same
city.

I know I am blessed in the sense that I've never had to experience a
broken heart or rejection like this earlier. For being almost 29 years
old I think that is good statistics. Also, the broken heart I did
experience this December was due partially to the fact that we live in
different countries and that the guy panicked. Not a good excuse but
an explanation as good as any (although of course there's more to it
than that).

THIS on the other hand is just plain weird. I refuse to give in to the
common idea that men are idiots, for some reason it doesn't simplify
the rejection itself.

I am tired of being helped back up my feet just to fall flat on my
face again. I need to be able to get back up myself.

I am so tired I want to cry and then sleep for a whole consecutive
month. Heal heart, please heal.

What are you up to?

Sent via my iPhone

Butterflies

2010-01-11T23:27:00.003+01:00

I think I can feel them. Or, I can feel them. I just try not to acknowledge their presence, I am so scared I will let go and be all vulnerable again.

I did learn alot from my broken heart experience. I learned that life is too short not to enjoy every word, every look, every smile shared together with someone special. I learned to open up to new experiences and new feelings. This "grown-up-love" is a new feeling to me, I still want the still chaos but I also want something to build on. I learned to put alot of personal crap aside to be with someone although it never worked out. I learned that sad songs mend a broken heart. I learned that with time, all sadness passes. And I think I'm ready now. I think I took whatever positive lessons from this and I can cherish them and use them in my life. I learned that not only will wonderful people enter your life if you let them, but you will also be seen in a different light, be appreciated for something no one else has not yet seen in you. I learned that there is not only one type of person for you. That there is not just one way to walk.

And even though this might not turn out to be anything durable I will always appreciate also this experience. Meeting someone new and realizing small flaws only add to the perfection of that person.

He sees me and I hope he will continue to want to see me, for who I am and for who I can be. The one person I really miss right now, the one person I hope I will go to bed with for many nights to come in my life.

Will keep you posted. For now, this is all I dare to say. And it's already a whole lot..!

Back on my feet

2010-01-08T15:31:00.001+01:00

Getting back to life again. I cannot believe only a month has passed
since I was in Florence and got my heart broken into a million little
pieces.

A new year, a new decade, might have been exactly what I needed to put
it all back into place.

One quick try with a certain "restaurant hip hopper" did make me lose
direction briefly. Out of many things it made me realize that his
presence only made me feel more lonely. So I ended it then and there.
Didn't want him wasting his time, I couldn't feel a thing.

But now, perhaps I've met a person who actually has made me make the
past a past, with him I feel new again. Who knows, maybe he'll turn
out to be nothing more than a wonderful rebound, but so be it!

On my way home now, left work early since I feel a fever coming on. I
had a dinner date planned (with this certain person) but I just heard
from him, he's also coming down with something so perhaps we'll be ill
together, just watch a movie or so.

Fingers crossed I'll feel better after a couple of hours of sleep! I
really want to see him!

Sent via my iPhone

Broken-hearted girl

2009-12-31T00:13:00.006+01:00

Getting by, taking it little by little.
It's the only thing I can't really talk about anymore but the only thing on my mind for the last month.

I thought it would get easier with time but now I'm relapsing and I'm back there, with all the questions unanswered and just a silence to talk to.

I'll let Tiziano Ferro speak my mind. This song here below, "Il regalo più grande" was actually dedicated to me by him. I never really listened to it then, I think I was scared of what it might have said. And now it's too late and those words hurt even more because they meant something to him.

Il Regalo Più Grande
The Greatest Gift

Voglio farti un regalo
I want to get you a gift
Qualcosa di dolce, qualcosa di raro
Something sweet, something rare
Non un comune regalo
Not a common gift
Di quelli che hai perso, o mai aperto
Like those that you've lost, or never opened
O lasciato in treno, o mai accettato
Or left in the train, or never accepted
Di quelli che apri e poi piangi
But those that you open and then you cry
Che sei contenta e non fingi
And you're happy and not pretending
In questo giorno di metà settembre
On this day in mid-September
Ti dedicherò il regalo mio più grande
I will devote to you, my greatest gift

Vorrei donare il tuo sorriso alla luna perché
I want to give your smile to the moon so that
Di notte chi la guarda possa pensare a te
At night whoever sees it can think of you
Per ricordarti che il mio amore è importante
To remind you that my love is important
Che non importa ciò che dice la gente
And that it doesn't matter what people say
Perché tu mi hai protetto con la tua gelosia che anche
Because you've protected me with your jealousy and
Che molto stanco il tuo sorriso non andava via
When very tired your smile did not go away
Devo partire però se ho nel cuore
I have to leave but if I know in my heart
La tua presenza è sempre arrivo e mai partenza
That your presence is always an arrival and never a departure
Il regalo mio più grande
My greatest gift
Il regalo mio più grande
My greatest gift

Vorrei mi facessi un regalo
I want you to get me a gift
Un sogno inespresso, donarmelo adesso
An unvoiced dream, now given to me
Di quelli che non so aprire
One that I know not to open
Di fronte ad altra gente
In front of other people
Perché il regalo più grande
Because the greatest gift
È solo nostro per sempre
is only our forever

Vorrei donare il tuo sorriso alla luna perché
I want to give your smile to the moon so that
Di notte chi la guarda possa pensare a te
At night whoever sees it can think of you
Per ricordarti che il mio amore è importante
To remind you that my love is important
Che non importa ciò che dice la gente
And that it doesn't matter what people say
Perché tu mi hai protetto con la tua gelosia che anche
Because you've protected me with your jealousy and
Che molto stanco il tuo sorriso non andava via
When very tired your smile did not go away
Devo partire però se ho nel cuore
I have to leave but if I know in my heart
La tua presenza è sempre arrivo e mai...
That your presence is always an arrival and never...

E se arrivasse ora la fine che sia in un burrone
And if the end arrived now, let it be in a canyon
Non per volermi odiare solo per voler volare
Not for you to hate me, only because I want to fly
E se ti nega tutto questa estrema agonia
And if this extreme agony denies you everything
E se ti nega anche la vita respira la mia
And if it also denies you life itself, breathe mine
E stavo attento a non amare prima di incontrarti
I was careful not to love before I met you
E confondevo la mia vita con quella degli altri
And confused my life with that of another
Non voglio farmi più del male adesso
I don't want to hurt myself anymore
Amore, amore
Love, love

Vorrei donare il tuo sorriso alla luna perché
I want to give your smile to the moon so that
Di notte chi la guarda possa pensare a te
At night whoever sees it can think of you
Per ricordarti che il mio amore è importante
To remind you that my love is important
Che non importa ciò che dice la gente
And that it doesn't matter what people say
E poi
And then
L'amore dato amore preso amore mai reso
The love given, love taken, love never returned
Amore grande come il tempo che non si è arreso
Love so great like time that has never surrendered
Amore che mi parla coi tuoi occhi qui di fronte
Love that speaks with your eyes here facing me

Sei tu sei tu sei tu sei tu sei tu
It's you, it's you, it's you, it's you, it's you
Il regalo mio più grande
My greatest gift

Dramatic, right? It speaks right to me in so many ways, I don't know what to do with all of this sadness.

Happy New Year!

Suffering..

2009-12-09T01:08:00.004+01:00

...from a broken heart.

The first time ever. Will it ever pass?

If so, I will let you know.

"Oh Lordy, don't leave me, all by myself.."

The Big Apple

2009-10-30T12:58:00.001+01:00

I'm finally on my way!!!

Finally going back to the greatest city on Earth!! I'm so happy, I
need to go away (and dream it all up again, as Bono would say) and I
need that space for air, thoughts, reflections...

When I get off the plane I'll be in Reykjavik Iceland. Cool!

I also need to sort out my thoughts and feelings. For the last four
days I've had a friend from Florence staying at my place. We started
out as colleagues at Gucci and now, almost four years since I last saw
him, he came to see me (thanks Facebook!) and we just hit it off
completely! Weird but wonderful, these last days have been filled with
laughter, jokes, Italian food, singing (yup, really!) and kisses, hugs
and butterflies.

I seriously need to go away and sort out my thoughts.

Thanks to my two readers a day I feel I need to update this page, I'm
so bad at consistency!!! Thanks Sitemeter for telling me you're still
out there, checking up on me every once in a while!

Xoxo, ttys!

Sent via my iPhone

Lindex leather jacket and finding my way back home

2009-09-27T22:51:00.007+02:00

My friends never succeeded in finding that jacket in my size, only large sizes left. Too bad, it is so nice! I'm guessing the fashion bloggers are to blame, if one of them hypes an item it will be sold out in no time. And me, not too active in that area, trying to find my own golden items, gets totally left without! Well, sorry for not being such an active reader of Swedish teen-bop fashion blogs!! Argh. Really just disappointed, it looks so nice and was so cheap!

While they've been running about town doing my dirty errands (I wish, it wasn't really like that at all..) I've been lying on the couch sweating, freezing, sipping soup and tea and fantisizing of junk food to eat. Still ill and getting quite bored of it. Did some cleaning up today, so I can at least feel yukky in a clean apartment. It made me feel a little better actually.

Perhaps I should take a photo or two to show my dear readers (if there are any still out there) what my apartment looks like? Would that be fun?

Hmm. Anyway, getting more and more childishly pleased with my new MacBook Pro! I have gotten MacJournal Trial, ViJournal Lite and MiLife (shareware) and I am trying to compare them. So far, I am not at all impressed with.. ViJournal at all. Boring interface and no real functions. When I tried pasting a photo it filled up the whole screen and there was no way of adjusting the size. Things like that would bug me if I depended my daily life on it.

See, I figured I need to get back on track again, re-figuring out who I am. Not that I feel lost or anything, I just lost a little bit of track recently. A little bit of direction, motivation, purpose. Perhaps it has some to do with the fact that two close friends have been a little down recently. Of course it affects me and the questions they pose themselves, their doubts and worries sometimes gets to me too. Not that I feel attacked, no, more that I start pondering myself. Also, posing the question why I seem to have my act together and not get sad. What do I do to get by? Do I get by? Really? And there we go. It's not anything major, I am still happy, calm and I have no issues (other than being ill and hating it). I have things to look forward to the coming month, I have a great loving family, wonderful friends, a job I love coming to every morning, a home I love returning to every evening..! Is the loneliness bugging me? Yes, sometimes. More and more recently. But I'll live through that too, like the past three autumns of being single in Sweden. As well as the saying goes "not alone but lonely" it can also be twisted. Like, "I'm alone but I don't feel lonely". Like alone itself would necessarily be a bad thing. I don't know. I don't know if I'm fighting it or if I make sense. Either or, I have some thinking to do.

Anyway. Will write a little, probably in MacJournal, and then go to bed. Quite tired but head is spinning (not only because of the above) as my friend told me that she ran into my ex at an event Thursday evening. But THAT, I don't feel like talking about.

Also found my long lost W.B Yeats book. I love his poems. Love them. Yes, that is something I will do to re-trace my steps to my path. And read Allen Ginsberg again. Yes.

Good night!

Being ill

2009-09-26T11:28:00.003+02:00

Peeps!

I am really really ill! Lying in bed, all covered up, primped up with pillows behind my back... Sweet neighbour friend just came by with a box of Big Pack 3-flavour icecream (yup, childhood memories). I've got tonsillitis, in Swedish referred to as halsfluss. It's really killling me. I can't swallow anything more solid than liquid, crap, even that is hard. I sould like a tortured smurf when I speak..

I would feel sorry for a boyfriend to live with me but yet I wish nothing more right now. Someone to gently stroke my head when I lie in the couch with a fever, someone to make me tea or simply just someone to put a blanket on me when I get the chills from the fever- and then of course- to take it off when I start sweating like a little pig..!

So. Luckily I have McBook Pro to keep me company. I must say he's good at it. I have so far watched three episodes of "Hung" and installed iWorks. I still have to figure out why my Transmission is killing my Firefox, but I'll get there.

I have been surfing around a little, looking for a fake leather jacket. It started off when I saw this gorgeous little MC-jacket in Lindex's shop window. Of course it's all sold out over town, and online too, but I have two friends looking for it in the suburbs this weekend. Then I started surfing around looking at other sites that might have something similar. And now I can't stop!

I have all the time on my hands, I loaded bank account and noone to tell me no. Dangerous!

This is the only thing I've found so far:

I'm just getting started..!

Nope, will go and get a glass of water, drink it through agonizing pain and then perhaps sleep for a little. That icecream just about killed me.

Later!

1st MacBook note

2009-09-24T01:39:00.002+02:00

So.. Here I am, tapping away in the dark like a vampire on my new, shiny MacBook Pro! I cannot believe it myself, I'm so happy!

Getting used to it really and truly takes its time, especially since I want to get to know it (him/her.. err) properly. I'm not saying it's easy, and it's not because I'm a PC-user by default, it's just hard that's all.

Could give you thousands of examples already, little quirkiness from both our sides I assume, but I'm so tired I'm almost fainting. It's 1.42 at night, I need to get up and go to work within 5 hrs and I'm just waiting for this little thing to get fully recharged. What I can't understand is how it 15 mins ago read 7 mins until ready and now reads 12 mins.

Aaah, now the green light went off on the chord! Off to bed like a lightning bolt!

Will explore away these coming days, if you can bear with me!

XOXO

A new buddy

2009-09-21T23:40:00.005+02:00

Hi all,

feeling like the worst blogger on the planet. And, yes, I am the worst blogger ever!!

I haven't forgotten about you, life just got in the way. And no, still no love life, just a busy life with work, friends, laughter, fashion, food, events.. Ya know.

Blogging quickly before I'm off to bed.

I feel like such a cheater for writing this, on my old friend Fred, but Wednesday evening a new member of my tiny family will see the light of day!

A smashing MacBook Pro! I am so happy, I've wanted this for so long. Fred is still a great companion, although a little old and rusty. So I'll let him live his last days as a retired old man at my parents' house. He'll do good there, he'll assist my Mun when she's typing out all her english-class homework.

I'll really miss him, his loud buzzing, his boiling temperature.. What I probably will miss (seriously) is his crystal clear 15-inch screen. New MacBook is a small 13-inch one, but I think I'll manage.

So, Fred, ol' buddy.
I've had some of my best times with you. You've been good to me, I chose you wisely but all things must end.

MacBook, I welcome you.
Next post I'll make will hopefully be from an Apple.
God knows how I'll make it but I'll give it a go.

Fred, ol' sidekick

MacBook, new buddy

U2 Ultraviolet(Light My Way) at Croke Park first night

2009-08-24T08:29:00.001+02:00

The personal highlight of the u2 concert, this particular film is from
the Dublin show, but anyway! My films will probably be uploaded within
these days. Sorry for being such an ambivalent blogger!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5yB4DWGvGf4

Sent via my iPhone

Christian Bale

2009-07-19T00:57:00.006+02:00

When I was a kid I went to the movies with my mother and saw "Mio min Mio" by Astrid Lindgren. I remember liking the kid that played Mio's friend.

Like a week ago I was drooling over Christian Bale (don't remember exactly why I started this time but he's so hot) and I discovered he actually starred in that movie, as Mio's friend of course! How random is that?

Also, for some giggling, read this online article of newly buffed celebrities! They're all funy but Edward Norton is very very funny! http://www.cracked.com/article_15623_ripped-club-8-non-athletes-whove-gotta-be-on-steroids.html

I have now googled and drooled some more over a picture search.
Enjoy!

Oh my God!

2009-07-05T00:19:00.005+02:00

I would love love love to be like this lady when I grow old!!

Imagine me, with silver hair (or raven black as I would be so vain and tint it), semi-flat shoes, a crazy dress and a coat, dog in a leach.. A pug perhaps, or a fat little chiahuahua that would be called as a Roman emperor.

The mere fact that she lives in Paris makes this even more perfect.

Thanks to sartorialist.com for this amazing photo that just made my day (now that Unfatihful has ended..!)

Unfaithful

2009-07-04T22:47:00.003+02:00

The best thing just happened to me. After having had pizza, wine and good conversation with Jonna and she left, I switched on the TV to see what was on before settling down with a good movie.

Then, on channel 5 they are showing "Unfaithful", my first Olivier Martinez experience when I was 21 years old. I remember I was in the cinema where I was working at the time, it was a day time screening so almost no one but me in there. And I remember being so taken with him, with her, their intensity and the sizzling sex scenes that almost embarrased me (the screen was so large). And man, those scenes are still sizzling.

Olivier Martinez is such a woman's man, even though he's not your type he still gets to you, especially if you've watched "Unfaithful"! Poor Richard Gere. And Diane Lane is so beautiful and fresh, I am wishing to look as fresh as her when I'm her age!

Little sale update

2009-07-04T22:26:00.002+02:00

I sold the shoes, the jumpsuit and the cell phone in just a few days.

If anyone would still be interested in the little box t-shirt..?

Haha.

Jenny sale!

2009-06-02T00:42:00.005+02:00

I am selling some things on Blocket.se but I also thought perhaps to post them here..!

LG Viewty KU990 cell-phone, 1000 sek.

Read more about my old lovely 5 mp touchscreen cell at:

http://reviews.cnet.co.uk/mobiles/0,39030106,49292601-1,00.htm
http://www.gsmarena.com/lg_ku990_viewty-review-167.php

Mine has been used and handled with great love and care. A little scratch on the display and some minor bumps and scratches on the edges of the cell. Nothing serious. Comes with the box and all original accessories such as handsfree/earphones, USB cable and charger.

Minimarket top Box, size XS, 450 sek.

White Japanese cotton fabric with neon pilling. Short box style, one pocket on front.
Measures 60 cm width, 45 cm length neckline to waist.

Never worn but just washed after some time hanging in the closet.
Original price ca. 850 sek.

Office ankleboots size 40, 450 sek.

Have been used once for a fashion shoot.
Too large for me but I was planning on using an insole. Didn't work unfortunately..
Orginal price £80 (930 sek).

Beige leather and light beige canvas.

3 cm platform sole, 14,5 cm heel.

Vero Moda jumpsuit size S, 200 sek.

Sold out after a day in Stockholm stores.

Length 117 cm from chestline to ankle.
Width 29 cm chestline. Very elastic bandeau-style top part.
Original price 259 sek. Used once.

If you like any of the stuff, just send me a message!
I can check for safest and cheapest postal service for whoever decides to buy!

Tootles!

My new drawing!

2009-05-28T01:12:00.003+02:00

I just treated myself to a drawing to hang on my wall!

I am very happy, although it was not at all what I had in mind when I started to browse for paintings. I thought perhaps a Rothko, or perhaps Cassandre..
But nope!

A plain little drawing with coffee stains on it!

What do you think?
Courtesy of www.allposters.com

The sleepiest cat in the world!

2009-05-22T00:17:00.000+02:00

My Jacket Little!

2009-05-08T09:40:00.001+02:00

This was taken in the elevator in my building, hence the fenced
sliding door.

The jacket is beige/camel although here it looks almost light pink!

Minimarket, I love you

2009-05-08T08:14:00.001+02:00

Last night after work I was invited to the Minimarket sale in their
office. It officially starts today but as a friend I could bargain one
day earlier.

I didn't expect much but it was crazy!! So much stuff I had to make a
selection of where to start looking and I immediately spotted some
camel coloured wool. The Jacket Little from AW08 is MINE now!! I have
loved it since I worked with it over a year ago, I just forgot about it!

Same thing with a long-sleeved black shirt with a stitched-on satin
vest inside. I will wear it like a jacket and I plan on doing so all
summer! It's perfect and yet another long-lost love of mine.

Tonight I will see Ante after work. I have missed him dearly, we have
a lot of catching up to do!

Sunday is Jonna day, she returned last night from Paris and I am
excited to hear all about it!

I hope your day will be wonderful!

Tootles!

2009-05-02T04:01:00.001+02:00

Let's see how this mobile blogging works! Keeping my fingers crossed,
it would enable me to blog casually on a daily basis, ideally!

Also, promise to update soon. Have been way too busy working and
playing with iPhone!

Skickat från min iPhone

U2 at Letterman Show Friday March 6th

2009-04-06T01:38:00.003+02:00

U2 at Letterman Show Thursday March 5th

2009-04-06T01:36:00.003+02:00

U2 at Letterman Show Wednesday March 4th

2009-04-06T01:34:00.003+02:00

Photos from Florence

2009-04-06T00:39:00.010+02:00

Flying over the Italian Alps. Always so beautiful, I love taking photos when I'm flying!

Finally arrived in Florence. Outside Natalia's house.
Travelled quite light, did my best to pack but I did in the middle of the night so I had no clue really what I put in that little suitcase.

In PIazza Signoria, in the heart of Firenze.
Was so delighted to be back, we had lunch at La Posta, my favourite hang-out!

The evening after we were invited to a dinner in San Casciano in the countryside.
Here is Natalia with her friend Hana.

All the good food we could eat. Salumi, risotto, pasta bolognese, salad..! Lots of wine.

Nati and me by the huge fireplace.

Natalia and Andrea did their best to get me drunk so I would come out with them after the dinner!

Before leaving the house to go to Colle Bereto.
Myself, Andrea, Natalia and Hana!

Hana, Melina and myself.
Both girls are great, Melina is wild and lots of fun, we hit it off straight away!

With Jennifer and Nicola at Colle Bereto. Jennifer is Natalia's friend, and Nicola is Jennifer's boyfriend.
Great great people, lots of fun.
I made many new great friends this trip!

Natalia, Gerardo and myself.
Gerardo is crazy, he has the confidence of a male supermodel.
Funny but not so nice if you catch his attention, he's hard to shake off (you face)!

This guy the girls call "the little Lord", he's half Brittish and half Italian, such a gentleman!
I really fancied him although in reality he's a little short.
At first sight it struck me how similar he is to Chris O'Donnell.
I like Chris O'Donnell!

Natalia and myself in Nicola's car.
I love this photo, we had the best time in the back seat!
On our way to the night club Full Up.

We went for aperitivo Tuesday evening, at OÈ, a Japanese style restaurant.
Ok food but the best part was the downstairs smoking lounge.

Wednesday I met Victoria for a coffee at my old University café at Via Alfani.
Then we biked off to her place for lunch, spaghetti with tuna tomato sauce, really good!

In the evening Vicky came over to our place to go out.
Here we are posing the kitchen, next to Audrey on the cover of Vogue!

On our way to Open Bar, Karin and myself are posing next to the glow-in-the-dark-policemen at Ponte Vecchio.

The vodka at Slowly.
It was by Roberto Cavalli but I'm not sure it tasted greater than any other I have tasted?
The display was really pretty though!

Next to Ponte Santa Trinità with Ponte Vecchio in the back, going for a drink at Nove to hear my old Gucci colleague Gianni spin records.
We met up with my other Gucci friends Alessandro and Pedro.
Nice wine but no food.

After Nove we met up with Alexandra at Colle Bereto (again).
Had more drinks and then went upstairs quickly.
Alex had just been to the hairdresser to get highlights, so we had to show her new hair off!

The night of the big party at Casa Sweden!
Here, Sofia and myself are preparing dinner in the kitchen!

Here Natalia and I are posing.
She had planned the party very precisely, I might hire her services the next time I need to throw a big-ass party! Kudos for all the Italian men showing up, haha!

Karin and Sofia enjoying the food (pasta with ricotta tomato sauce) and wine!

Natalia posing with Hanna!
So nice to meet up with long-lost friends from the past!

Cuddling with Vicky, one of my closest friends in Florence.
I miss her so much but at least I had the time to see her, her new apartment and her boyfriend (fiancé!).

Getting cosy with Hanna!

Toasting with prosecco brought to us by a girl from that precise area of Italy!
It was sooo good!

Alexandra and Natalia enjoying the prosecco in the kitchen!

I found Jennifer in the big crowd.
Thanked her and Nicola for last week at Colle and Full Up, I had such a great time.

After that I don't remember that much of the evening. When the others left to go clubbing, myself, Natalia and Alexandra stayed in to clean up the mess. When Karin and Sofia returned home at 5 a.m. the house was so clean they said it was like it never happened. Haha!

With Karin at La Posta before leaving for the airport.
I had a tuna salad the size of my head, didn't want to risk a tummy ache with some bresaola (like Karin had) even though I love it.

Anja Rubik

2009-04-06T00:25:00.001+02:00

She's so great, my favourite supermodel as of now.

I love this little snippet, I get fashion high from it!

U2 at Letterman Show Tuesday March 3rd

2009-03-04T22:01:00.002+01:00

Oh, Adam is such a man tucking those earplugs in under his jacket at the end. Although, had he been my man I would've had his sleeves shortened a little.

U2 at Letterman Show Monday March 2nd

2009-03-04T00:17:00.003+01:00

Adam looks immaculate! Such a handsome man..!

Good stuff

2009-02-24T21:20:00.004+01:00

Last night I was supposed to watch "He's just not that into you", inspired of a scene from the Sex and The City show, and curl up in bed.
I had no snacks at home and I was in a very snacky mood, so I checked what was in my fridge.
I had nothing but 1 kg of beetroots and I googled beetroot crisps and came up with this.
They were really good if you like beetroots although I would advice you to crank the heat up some and then leave them to cold afterwards, as they are still quite mushy after 15 mins in the oven. I had them with salt, no oil. Delicious and healthy!

Today I binged on potatoes slices in the oven, baked with rosemary and olive oil. I made a sour-cream dip with pepper, tomatoe puré and ketchup.
Really good.

This was my way of waving bye-bye to all things packed with carbs as I am trying to lose some quick weight as well as working out. The main reason is my up and coming trip back home to Florence.
Since my leaving, 2,5 years ago, I gained 8 kgs and I would like to lose at least some of them.
Although, I must add, becoming a newly addicted gym-oholic I must say it's not so much the weight itself, but how I feel about myself.

I have also seriously seriously considered selling parts of my body to be able to afford these shoes. I tried them on in Paris in August, I need to have them.

Gucci Babouska, be mine! I could walk a thousand miles in these!

Waiting around for the latest episode of The City to be added to mtv.com, I have waited for a whole week!! So tried my eyes almost cross, but I need to get my weekly fashion fix, drama fix, thin fix and NYC fix.

Tomorrow I have a Minimarket at Weekday fashion preview party to go to, a little wine to down (perhaps at Riche?) and before that, hitting the gym! Can't wait to yoga away, totally zen like!

Tootles my dears, hope to get a comment soon again! I miss them!

The Academy Awards 2009

2009-02-24T00:09:00.006+01:00

There are sites that only tell you the name and the designer.

And then there is Gawker, always with the funniest bylines.

http://gawker.com/5158695/the-oscar-parties-youll-never-be-invited-to

Seeing the photos at style.com I must mention Natalie Portman in Rodarte (although the colour was a little weird). She is so beautiful.

Conclusion is that strapless and assymetric is cool when you go to big parties like this.
Sadly I spotted no hair accessories, and the jewelry I thought was too discrete
(only not so much so on Sophia Loren).

Nicole and Tilda both looked slightly deader than usual
(I know it's incorrect to conjugate like that but what else to say)..
and I am surprised to see Sean Penn and Robin back together. There went all my hope.

I also heard a rumour that Sarah Jessica Parker fainted in her gown?
And why is Anne Hathaway always so boring?

All red carpet photos courtesy of style.com

2009-02-23T23:05:00.004+01:00

To get us back on track with each other, me telling you all about my life and you knowing all about my life, I will give you some photos to show you what's in my head, in my heart, around me and with me!

Hope I've kept some faithful readers during my disappearance..!

Making Italian foccaccia with rosemary, sea salt, olive oil and black olives together with Elena (photo) and Emilia. We also had some chanterel risotto, yum.
And to believe that I am swearing off carbs now, to lose water weight quickly! AAH!

Monki pumps that I had to return when I was out of money.
Really sad, I liked them. I think we can rekindle our romance one payday is here..!

H&M black pumps.
I kept these ones when going broke, I used them straight after buying them since I fell so much in love.
Very comfy and very cheap.
I love H&M for quick fixes like this! They will most likely be my travelling shoes for Italy!

Elena at Emilia's.
Pre-party that just ended up being the three of us munching away on biscuits and French cheese.
Lovely!

See how happy we were!

Emilia enjoying her white wine

At the actual party, we were all kind of missing the cheese. We left quite early.

I think I need this for my coins and cards. Yup.
Balenciaga at their best. Nicholas, be mine!

Source: The Sartorialist

This crew had their photo taken at Pitti Filati in Florence, by Scott.
I used to sunbathe with this group when I lived there.
They were sooo fashion, I didn't understand how they could expose their white skin to the scorching Italian sun? Let's also add they were always decked out in neon patent leather swimwear, Ray Bans and lots of hair product. I once saw one of them go in the water in the pool.
The others I think had their casual cigarette in hand at all times, thus preventing them from actually swimming.

And this, dear readers, is me summer 2009. Hahaha!
I actually admire the way Heidi has shaped up, physically that is (mentally she's as empty as always) and I find it inspiring. Since I now go religiously to the gym like three times a week, I need the motivation to keep me from the crisps and the candy.
Boobs aside, I think she has a nice lean body.

Beautiful Minimarket AW09 boots!
Will most definitely pick up a pair, the problem is to pick a colour!
Pierre Hardy slingbacks! Not usually a fan but I really like these!

The gorgeour Chloé Milton hobo.
I tried to forget about it for two months now, but it's still on sale at Luisa Via Roma in Florence.
I love it, they sell it in cream white lamb skin, it is to die for.
If I take out all my savings and promise not to buy (nor eat) anything until the summer, perhaps I could make it.

2009-02-08T15:58:00.006+01:00

So many things have happened. I will tell you mainly in photos, as I have trouble recalling exactly when and where I've been!

This year started off with me being very ill, staying in for a week with the flu. That made me save money and drop one size in jeans.

Have spoken to my dear friend in NYC as well. I think he misses me.
Sadly, as much as I do care for him, we are nothing alike and I think we would drive each other mad if we even as much as tried to be together (a physical impossibility but you know) even though I must admit I am so tempted on leaving this life behind and settling in NYC.
I miss that place so much it hurts.

I have also gotten tickets to go to Florence in the end of March! I will be away for ten days and I am super psyched! Trying to save up but I'm afraid it's impossible.
So, no Gucci for me? We'll see.

With Jonna and the girls at a bar at Södermalm.
We celebrated that we are not trees and that the paycheck had arrived! I was so happy since I had found a sequinned jacket and new shoes!

Sthlm Fashion Week.
Waiting outside for the Weekday show. Me and Emilia ended up going drinking at Berns instead, as we didn't have the patience to wait.

My darling friend Tommaso flew in from Milan for the day and we ended up at Berns for the last night of Sthlm Fashion Week.
This was us after two glasses of wine at 10 p.m.

This is Tommy around 2 a.m.
I was in no state to be photograped at all.

I lost my steady hands around midnight I'd say.
Here is my darling Gorjan on the phone with our mutual friend James in NYC.

Tired and slightly grumpy yesterday morning, trying on my new 5preview for Weekday tisha.
I decided it is a keeper! I love it.

For more cool things from them, check out the link on your right!

Waffle breakfast with the girls yesterday. We needed to discuss the matters of my broken heart, as my ex and I are no longer on speaking terms since last week. What to do without your closest friends? Ah, I don't know! And, if good food in abundance is included, then there is no excuse not to!

Last night I was laying on my couch, watching the second season of The Tudors and eating popcorn when I just really felt the need to see someone.
So I texted my friend Elena from Florence (half Swedish half Italian, living quite close to me) and she came over for improvised poorman's pasta dinner. I also texted Emilia from work, she had been in working the whole day and I thought she'd need the distraction so I invited her too. They both came over and we had food and wine around 9 p.m. (Italian dinner hour), talking and talking and laughing. They ended up leaving my house at 4.30 a.m.! We had such a good time, the only bad thing is that we smoked at the table and I now lay in bed all day with the windows slightly open to get the nasty smell away.

But it was worth it!

Click on the photo or on the link below to check out this mini coverage of my friend Andreas' girlfriend Sofia from French Vogue! I think it's soo cool that she is featured (in FRENCH VOGUE!!!!) and I am not at all jealous. Eeeh.
Heheh.

http://www.vogue.fr/Mode/unefilleunestyle/081116-test-sofia.aspx

I have also, due to cold weather and lack of energy, become a tv-show junkie!
I religiously follow The City (ooh, aah, the fashion in the Big Apple!), Criminal Minds, Dirty Sexy Money, Without a Trace, The Tudors, Californication (is there to be a 3rd season?), Lipstick Jungle, Gossip Girl, Mad Men, Arrested Development, No Reservations with Anthony Bourdain.. Phew.
Everything that has somewhat of a storyline.
I also tried True Blood (horrible) and The L Word (lesbian sex made to please straight men? It's boring).

Ok, will do laundry, have icecream (after my healthy dinner of salmon fillet in oven with spinach and boiled dill potatoes) and watch the end of season two of the Tudors!

Yay! The duke of Suffolk is still the most handsome man! At work I e-mailed a photo of him in full costume to one of my co-workers, and now the whole female part of my section will start watching it!

Haha.

Tootles.

2009-02-02T00:52:00.004+01:00

I am sorry my dearest readers, I am a bad bad blogger.

Have had too much to attend to, like Stockholm Fashion Week the past week.
Then this weekend has been a two-day couch marathon,
I have watched so many tv-shows and eaten so much junk food in complete solitude.
I enjoyed every minute.

I need to digest the impressions from the past days of constant fashion, glamour and too much white wine (and the junk food previously mentioned of course).

Will get back to you in these days with a huge update!

Tataaa!

2009-01-14T22:58:00.004+01:00

It is, indeed, lonely at the top.
Feeling somewhat lost. Where are you?
I think I've waited enough.

When I was ill for a week (last week) I woke up one morning to this beautiful view at 7 a.m.,
took a picture and went back to bed.

Adam Clayton, I love you

2009-01-04T16:31:00.001+01:00

New Year's 2008-2009

2009-01-04T16:13:00.004+01:00

Adam Clayton, Adam Clayton, Adam Clayton, Adam Clayton, Adma layton, Adam Xlayron, Adam Xlayhton, Adam Claotn, Adam Clayuton, Ardam Claton, Adam Clayt

2008-12-17T22:02:00.008+01:00

Posting some photos of fun stuff I've done recently!

Hanging photos in my hallway!

Christmas party with work at Rosedal garden. With Sandra, dining.

Florence and Hanna at the dinner.

The work section day began with brunch at Eva's apartment.

Then we went ice skating. This is the children's accessories crew.

After work drinks with Sandra.

Enjoying a glass of wine with Dad and Mum

Cristmas market in Stockholm with Dad and Mum

I have also spoken to my ex in Italy.
He announced three weeks ago that he had met a new girl- SEVEN months ago!
I was upset for like two weeks. Not about the fact that he had met someone, but that he had "forgotten" to tell me for seven months.
Until now we've had a good relation but it's been a little hard on us.

Then one week ago he told me she had dumped him.
He was devastated but I didn't feel like I should be the one comforting him.
Anyways, feeling quite smug now.

I have also received my first Christmas gift, two lovely summery dresses from my friend in NYC. He has been sailing between Antigua and the Bermudas for two weeks and I think he picked them up there. It is very sweet of him, it made me smile on such a grey and boring day as yesterday.

I have been a little under the weather lately. Tired and stressed at work and also because I received some bad news recently about a very very loved one. It made me realize the little things in life are so incredibly important. Every moment is precious because we never really know how much time is left.

I hope you all are well. Missing the ones that are away.
Please come home soon, and until then, enjoy your time abroad!

PS. How many times do I need to write "Adam Clayton" until this page pops up when Googling his name?
That must be my only opportunity to make him find me..!
That is, if he Googles himself every now and then. DS.

My love in the car

2008-12-11T23:14:00.002+01:00

http://media.u2.com/flash/highlights/nicedrive.swf

This might not be entertaining for anyone else but me, watching my darling drive to Bono's house.

I wish I was there, sitting next to him.

My first reflection though, was that he looks like a mix of my friend Bruce and George Clooney.
Not necessarily a bad thing, although I would tell him to take that golden Rolex off.

Adam Clayton

2008-12-10T23:27:00.006+01:00

My future husband and the father of my unborn children is single again!!

After having seen U23D and being all in love again, I Googled him and found out he has broken up with his long-term girlfriend.

I am now planning to go on vacation whenever the world tour is beginning, always being there in the front by his side at every gig.

He's all I've ever thought I'd wanted. And more.

Yay!

All work and no play..

2008-11-12T23:09:00.005+01:00

..Makes Jenny a sad girl.

Work is slowly killing me. Not that I am complaining, I am lucky to have a job. It's just that I realize I haven't seen any of my friends for the last two weeks.

Have just watched Gossip Girl and Lipstick Jungle. Realizing more and more that I need to be in a place that gives me energy, not just taking it. I need to be in a thriving and beating place, where anything is possible.
The rest would be up to me.

And here I am, in a place where it's all up to me, all the time. If you want something, make it happen, goes the saying. Why can't it just happen?

And I know some of you might be delighted to read this, but this loneliness is slowly getting to me. Now it's the time for curling up in bed with someone and I just can't seem to find this person to just hold my head when I'm falling aslep on the nightbus, that person that pulls me back into bed when it's time to get up. And I hate myself for saying it, since I'm not that needy person, but I kind of want that.

If it doesn't happen very soon I will turn bitter and I don't want to.

Love love love was all over the place in Lipstick Jungle.
Inspiring but also completely exhausting.

I have a pile of old photos on my table, I need to reframe them and put them up on a wall. I flicked through them and I realized it was a very long time since I was smiling like that. Surrounded by the people I love in a place I came to call my home.

Florence has never seemed so far away. I miss it dearly.

Goodnight, sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite!

Next time I'll be cheerier. Dealing with fashion for a living makes me very unfashionable in my spare time. I'll get back to it, I promise.

Once upon a time..
..there was a girl..
..that never was lonely..
..nor bored..
..'cause she was living her life like this..
..every evening of the week!

2008-11-05T21:35:00.008+01:00

Hi all!

Sitting with a glass of red Tuscan wine, newly showered, waiting for the new episode of Lipstick Jungle to download. I have worked a total of 36 hours the latest three days, I am exhausted.

My buyer has been to Hong Kong and Korea for a week, then she jetted off on vacation to the Maldives for two weeks. I love the responsibility I have when I'm alone but don't really understand why the working hours pass twice as fast whenever she is gone. I always run out of time.

I like the fact that I am good at what I am doing. Today I had a talk with my boss about my job and my position and my role and my expectations and so on. Very good talk, it was important for me to know if they will let me sign a real contract and how I was doing according to them. And, they love me!

I could not be happier (and more tired)!

My boss also stated that I will become a buyer in the near future, I will start off soon with becoming responsible for a smaller section first. She also said that my main strength is in fashion, trends and fashion forecasting.
That made me very happy since that is bascially what I love.

I love myself almost as much as Vanity Smurf

So, rewarding myself with some good tv, enjoying the fact that today America wrote history when electing Obama for next president. I think it can be really good.

Since I work a lot I don't get to play a lot and I fear I have no friends left since I can only socialize in the weekends. I am bad at keeping in touch since I forget to answer on text messages or e-mails, I don't return phonecalls.. I really don't have the time during the days.

I also rewarded myself with a can of baby corn. Not even fresh baby corn, I love heating the canned ones and then let a big piece of butter melt on top of it.. It's seriously one of my favourite things to eat.

I have no time nor energy to cook dinner anymore, so I have stopped watching food tv every evening. So I have stopped being hungry all the time (I am now tired all the time, at least that doesn't make me fat) and I am back like 6 years in time when I had no interest whatsoever in food. Then my favourite thing to eat was quick macaronis with microwaved frozen meatballs and butter. And I could eat things out of cans. And, it's like that now as well. Canned corn, canned beans.. Noodles with soy sauce and garlic.. Anyways. Enough about food.

My darling Bruce in NYC has met a friend of a friend of his, a Swedish girl that works as a handbag merchandiser for Marc Jacobs. I told him to keep that contact and I will take him up on his offer to speak to her on my behalf later. It's bascially my dream job.

I have had some fun recently though.

My friend Tove was here for a weekend, we had dinner with Jonna and then went out. Jonna and I even made it to Berns, sipping mojitos all the way. Jonna is the best wing man ever, she was pimping me out like never before.

Tove at my roof-top terrace

Jonna mixing mojitos in my kitchen

My favourite place in Stockholm, Berns

I have also been out again with Jonna, for Halloween. We went to Le Rouge in the Old Town to try their famous cocktails. Unfortunately the atmosphere was sleepy so we just went to East and then home. No pimping last weekend, too bad.

I have also been trying to shop. I find things I like but then I don't go for it. Perhaps it's the experience of living last month without any money for the last two weeks. It was horrible and I don't want to be there again.

I did find this though:

The vest is from Zara and the turquoise jacket from Diesel.
Input?

When Tove was here she went to a shoe meeting (she's working with shoes) and she brought me this picture. I have to have them for Autumn 2009.

And I have become such a download junkie. All tv-shows that air in the States now again; Gossip Girl, Dirty Sexy Money, Criminal Minds, Mad Men, Lipstick Jungle..

The last one is even better than the first season, I am totally in love with Kirby Atwood, the young photographer.. He's strong and masculine, yet so romantic and crazy and sweet and caring..
Yum.

Usually I don't even like muscly men but he's really something.

Also, I want to look like Victory Ford, the incredibly cute designer!
She's perhaps half Asian and really really pretty..

Hmm, tired and stressed out.. And they say all Asians look the same. Right.

Saluting you from my cold city.

I found this on my camera the other day, the evening view from the roof-top a warm summer evening..

So sorry

2008-11-02T22:15:00.003+01:00

Will write a massive update when I have the time and energy..

I wish I could say I had been busy dating but unfortunately work takes up most of my time and energy..! Love it though, just a little.. lot.. much right now.

Will post pics and text tomorrow if I have the time, promise!

XOXOXOXOXOXOX!

The new me

2008-09-25T22:21:00.002+02:00

I am very happy. I love my hairdresser.

Fringes, overalls and chinos

2008-09-24T22:02:00.005+02:00

This is what greets me most mornings at the bus-stop.

Living in a country that is halfway in to fall has it perks when mornings are crisp and the light is cold.

I have worked like crazy these past days, for like a week I haven't left earlier than 20.30 at night.
Falling in to bed, or even worse, in to the couch where I've lay until midnight, drooling to BBC Food but way too tired to cook dinner.

The best part is, I love what I do and I think I'm good at it.
And also, we get cake sometimes!
That is the perk with working for a company that earns alot.

Plenty of cake!

Last weekend I managed to bribe Jonna into coming and helping me repaint my livingroom.
I thought it would take like three hours.
It took two days.

I also tempted her with the possibility of seeing me looking like an a**, in a little painter's overall.

Did I look like an a**? Judge for yourself.
I might add though, so did she!

Still going on about those glasses.
Everyone keeps telling me differently. And I have no clue.
One moment YSL, the next Armani.

Fringe though, that will happen for real tomorrow. Yup.

No more dodgy fake-fringe hair photos on this blog!

In my mind I will look like Monica Bellucci, in real life I will probably look like any token Asian woman (cartoon if you will) or that little Sanrio Pukka charachter. Yikes!

YSL, dark brown tortoise colour

Armani again.

Well well. Missing some good friends right now, that are far far away.
Also, missing my Florentine life. Missing being in control of my life.
Right now, I'm in control of all children's accessories S/S 2009 but the rest..? Well.
Baby steps.

Cute business controller on our neighbour department, but I think those economy guys are more into Ralp Lauren girls and blond ponytails.
Today, I even think he wore chinos and low Adidas Stan Smiths.
Isn't that token, well, then I don't know.

Shower and then episode 4 of Gossip Girl! Aah, I just love Wednesdays!

Four-eyed woman

2008-09-18T21:11:00.002+02:00

Armani, tortoise colour

Armani again, same as above

YSL, toffee brown

YSL, same as above

So, what do you reckon? The fake fringe (messy hair) is also an experiment. Think I really like it though.

Funny quote

2008-09-17T20:40:00.003+02:00

"If you turn into a pickle, there's no way of going back to being a cucumber".

This was said by some old rock star when talking about drugs, that there is no going back once you get hooked on heroin or something.
I thought it was funny.

Have been ill and quite down and out for some time, hence the bad blogging.

Dear readers (or whomever is still reading), I apologize.

Dreaming of exes and their break-ups (that probably will never come true), working working working, having Josefin over after four months apart.. Shopping, planning for Tove's visit in two weeks, eating way too many cookies, getting wasted on champagne, fixed my broken Gucci shoe for my last money this month..

Well. Nothing new really.

Am also trying out glasses and I had borrowed three different ones to take home and show you but I rushed from work and forgot them there. Will keep you posted.

Sorry for keeping it short but at the moment I am out of energy and need some rest.

Also, preparing for the Worldwide Blackout at 21.50 tonight!
Will you join?

Small update

2008-09-07T22:30:00.006+02:00

Hi peeps!

Sorry for being a crappy blogger. I've had too much on my mind after coming home from Paris.

Will write much more another day. Until then, here are some pics!

At Place des Vosges, being incredibly happy

Our hotel was right up the street from my future workplace

The river seen from Pont Neuf

Lunch in Belleville, the best vegetarian cous-cous I've ever had

Dinner in St Germain

The French croissants are the best in the world

Our hotel room was very.. orange..

The ladies room at the restaurant at Palais Royal..

Palais Royal.. Some of the splendid architecture there.

Best friends in Paris

On our way home, I was happy for my new bag from La Fayette.
It held most of my.. everything.

So little time..

2008-08-23T20:59:00.003+02:00

Hi all!

Sorry for being such an ambivalent blogger!
One week I post like ten posts and the next week; zero.

Work has been a little overwhelming, as has the new arrival of a long lost friend.
Actually, he's my boyfriend from when I was 16, we were together for five weeks and never hung out.
Plus, the departure of a very close friend yesterday. So.
Yeah. I've been busy.

Today, Saturday, I had no plans whatsoever.
Needed to clean the apartment but really didn't feel like it. I slept in, had breakfast in bed together with French Marie Claire, ELLE Paris and Italian Grazia, then went for coffee.

Tonight I cooked, watched TV and read the new issue of French Marie Claire.
Getting all psyched up for the upcoming trip soon!

Then I watched the Marc Jacobs & Louis Vuitton documentary and I loved every second of it.
He truly is the gay crush of my life.
It also made me remember the enthusiasm I had for fashion and this whole industry when I started studying, my heart started beating faster and faster while watching.
It's kind of easy to forget when I'm in the longest detail discussion over Hello Kitty hairstrings, via e-mail, with Hong Kong.

See a clip of it here:

Then I surfed the usual blogs and came up with these inspiring photos from a French blog;
Style & The City Paris!

Enjoy and have a great weekend all of y'all!

Fashion can be fun sometimes, right?!

I need glasses and the larger the better. Will look for these.

Rare to see an Asian girl that looks European for a change. I like her hair.

This is what I want to look like, forever and ever. She's gorgeous!
Also inspires me to finally take the step and go for a full-on fringe!

I'd love to travel in style like this! I always arrive all messy and mad.

The most amazing sky

2008-08-10T02:21:00.005+02:00

Look at this beautiful sky this evening.

Me and Gilla had rented a movie and when we returned back home Gilla looked out the window and called me over.

Look for yourselves. And I swear, no editing whatsoever of the pics! They are taken at different times, that's why the colours change a bit, plus I played around w ISO and whitebalance whilst shooting.

When we first saw it..

Then a little later..

A couple of minutes later..

And after maybe 15 minutes it got much higher! Amazing!
Then the clouds returned and the sky was grey again.

Last night I listened to One Republic, the band that made that tiring "Apologize" song with Timbaland earlier this year. I must say I really really like his voice. He plays the piano and the guitar, plus writes all the songs AND is a song writer for plenty of popular artists!
His name is Ryan Tedder, even the name is adorable.

And, here's the best part, he's born in 1979! Perfect! Finally a man I like that is younger than 35! Haha. He's cute in a funny way, looks a little like a cartoon animal of some sort. Really nice voice. Wouldn't mind him singing me to sleep every night.
I'll ask him over to see my view. Hahaha.

And, not forgetting, the original version of "Apologize" is much much better than the remix with that annoying Timbaland hollering in the background.

"..Imse vimse spindel, klättar uppför trån'.."

This evening, except for taking a hundred of photos of my view (I'm beginning to feel like the weather reports) we were supposed to watch a movie but after getting way into "The Next Best Thing" with Madonna and Rupert Everett we watched that one instead. And I advice you not to, it was crap.

Then we saw an old Posh Spice video with that fat guy from Another Level, that random British boyband that I liked so much for like 6 months when we were 17. Jonna hated that song "Freak Me". So we You Tubed them.

We moved on to other boybands throughout the evening, in order:

Another Level
E17
New Kids on the Block

It was such a walk down memory lane, all elementary school memories!

Our funniest was by far:

Another Level "Bomb Diggy"

E 17- Thunder

NKOTB- Hangin' Tough

I had forgotten it even existed!!!! "Tonight" was my all-time favourite!

"The Jordan Knightmare Interview", hilarious! I can never think of him in the same way ever again..
Whatever way that was... Hmm..

Off to bed.

Come on people, opinions on the coat, please!

My coat

2008-08-09T18:49:00.008+02:00

Ok folks, here you go. Give me your comments please. Yes or no?

Dark pic, but good to see the silhouette!

Front, still a little dark

Side, see it's a little bulky and hanging heavy.. Hmm..

And a little fattening as well..
(Also discovered w this photo that the previous tenant had four shelves attached to back wall!)

Front again, pleating and the generous sleeves

From the back. This photo makes me think of Balenciaga, I think it's the silhouette and the voluminous sleeves

Pleating in back. Looks like a wool kimono almost. Not good.

Finally.. The last one of about a hundred photos! I was boiling in it!

In a little while..

2008-08-09T12:46:00.002+02:00

I'll go and pick up the coat I wrote of yesterday.

I'll get it, come back home, and post pics of what it looks like.

It's wool (recycled, soo cool!) and with silk (or something like it) lining. The hem hits just at the knee. Will it make me short and stubby when I can't wear high heels with it? Will it make me as bulky as I think? Will I not wear it once I get it?

See, so many questions and there's only one way to find out.

Watch this space for photos!

My current view

2008-08-08T21:42:00.005+02:00

Isn't this the most gorgeous view?

For every day that I get to wake up and go to bed here, I am grateful.

Have a good evening, all of you.
I'm off to see Linda at the 08 party!

Weekly update

2008-08-08T20:15:00.018+02:00

So, after having been back to work for a week I've been exhausted.

I haven't seen, met, nor spoken to anyone for four days.
My main project these days, except for living through long days, has been to find a camera.
After two sleepless nights and plenty of phonecalls to different vendors, I had almost decided to splurge on a Panasonic Lumix TZ2 with wide-angle lens and yadi yada.
But everyone kept telling me to get the cheaper Canon Ixus 80,
the one I already thought of.
So.

What I did was to call the place that sold the Lumix for the highest price and asked them which to buy. I thought, if anyone should advice me to buy that one, it's them.
And if they tell me to get the Canon, well, then I'll just get the Canon.
Who am I to question ten professionals?

And you know what, they told me to get the Canon. So I did.
And I like it. Don't love it. Not yet.

Where I spend most of my free time. Just me, Fred and Josef Frank's Manhattan

Jonna and I talked about why I put so much effort into researching, it's almost like a drug.
I did it from 18.00 in the evening until 02.00 in the morning, for two consecutive nights. Arrived to work sleepy-eyed and tired, but I couldn't wait for the moment to go back home and continue searching.
In my lunch break I made phonecalls to vendors.
You get it.

Anyways, my theory is that I have it very easy to get addicted to things
(Thank God for not being in direct contact with drugs..) and
get hooked and never getting enough.
With people, with things, with feelings, with flavours, with music, cigarettes, wine..
And also, when I begin looking for something, wether it is a camera (as in this case),
a dress, shoes, magazine, furniture.. I always keep looking for that thing that finally completes me, that makes my life matter.
It sounds really sad, but it doesn't have to be.
It also makes me wanting more, going on and on.
Upward, forward is the thing.

Enough of this reflectiveness and let's move on!

Last night I bought my camera and then I went to the opening of the new Monki store
in the smack center of Stockholm.
It was a little rainy but the fashionable people of the capital had gathered for free wine, nibbles and cheap clothes.
It was nice but they poured me the fullest plastic mug of rosé and after having downed that one, I was down (and out) as well. Walking in zig-zag to the bus home at 21.30.
Haha.

Testing my new camera before going out

Sanna and Lisa

Today at lunch I saw my friend Anneka who has been to Florence to visit our friend Alexandra. Alex lives with my best Florence friend, Natalia,
so then they all got to hang out together. Lucky them.

She told me of all the things they'd done and where they had been eating and so on.
4 Leoni.. I love you. It made my heart ache, I miss it so much.

Anneka brought me back a birthday present from Nati and Alex.
Look below.

When I first saw them I was literally blinded by all the colours (you know I'm quite a natural shade person) and it took my approximately 5 seconds to fall head over heals in love.
I cherish them.

Tonight it is the 080808 party.
08 is the telephone area code for Stockholm so tonight we celebrate our beautiful city.
I actually see some blue skies after a day of rain. I think it might be a good night.

Looking east..

Looking west..

I also found an orange little banana fly with red eyes, in my glass, walking on the surface of the wine I'm drinking.
When I tried to lift him up using a piece of paper
(I didn't want to accidentally drown him, it's a good bottle of Sicilian wine) I succeeded,
but then happened to get stuck with the paper on the curved edge of my huge wine glass
and I catapulted him back into it and he died.

I poured myself a new glass and now I'm thinking that it can't get worse than that.

Looking forward to tonight! What are you up to, my loves?
Please write and tell!

Midnight sun

2008-08-08T20:00:00.004+02:00

For all of you who wonder;
Matteo and his friends had reached Rovaniemi, northern Finland, two days ago.

They are sightseeing during the days (whatever there is to see up there..!) and driving at nights, taking turns I presume.

I hope he gets to see some reindeer as he wished.

Input please!

2008-08-08T19:51:00.004+02:00

I found this today in the shops and I absolutely love it.

It is a size 34 and it was a little bulky though. I was told there are no smaller sizes and I am afraid it will make me look.. well.. bulkier.

Anyhow, the fitting is very very generous at the top, 3/4 length sleeves, tight-fitting waist and pocket. Kind of a tulip shape.

I was complimented in the shop by an American woman who thought it looked stunning. Hmm.

Don't know if I have the money though, especially after buying my love, the Canon Ixus (see below).

I'm thinking about buying it and returning it if I find a nicer coat in Paris. I think I have 30 days to return it. Then, water and air for 17 days!

Please, give me your input!

Waah!

2008-08-08T19:42:00.005+02:00

Anthony Bourdain is at Lux! Not in this moment, but on my TV!

His show Anthony Bourdain No Reservations are filming from Stockholm and he's enjoying the local dishes at the restaurant around the corner from where I live.

Oh, I wish it was in real time so I could go down there and shake his hand for being so damn funny!

Oh, and now he's at Mondo! But, why is he there with Kicki Berg from Mtv? I don't like her..

I Googled the band that's playing at the Mondo the night that he's there, and it turns out he was here in November 2005. I think I have to talk to Discovery about updating their show more often...! Grr.

Ah, now they are having Tunnbrödrulle and a Pucko and he loves it. They are at the local grill at Medborgarplatsen.

Oooh, I really really like him.

Wouldn't that be something

2008-08-03T14:01:00.002+02:00

Hey all,

forgot to mention that I listened to Bruce all the way back home.

Realized that all I want is to love and to be loved like a Springsteen song.

Nothing could be more beautiful than that.

My addiction

2008-08-02T23:28:00.003+02:00

Well, after two days in the wilderness I am back in the city.

I have sunbathed, started and finished "Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close", eaten and slept for about 25 hours out of the 50 hours I've been there.

Enjoying the warm water from the bridge by the boats

The book was amazing, I loved it.
A bit hard to get into, but after 10 or so pages, I was lost.
Marvelled over the language and innovative thoughts of the writer, cried a little bit when reading about the grand-parents..
I simply loved it.

Smoked salmon, egg, herring and sourcream from the store.
The rest from our own garden. Yummy.

Also did a little bit of shopping, when the sky opened and the rain came down.
Two pairs of shoes and an over-size white basic tee. The shoes are mainly comfortable and wearable for long days in Paris, very sensible of me!

This view made us decide to leave one day early

Safe back home on my couch.
Ate some fresh vegetables from the cottage garden and turned the TV on.
5 hours later I realize I am stuck. I am glued to BBC Food and Discovery Food & Travel.

Nigella, Anthony Bourdain, Masterchef goes large, Dehli Belly.. I cannot get enough!

No wonder I am hungry all the time!

Tomorrow I will enjoy a lazy Sunday with bestest Jonna. Will go camera hunting at Åhléns, since I got a gift card there from my parents.

And oh, I went on a coffee date with Matteo before leaving for the countryside.
He's lovely and very sweet but on his way to see Laps and reindeer in northern Finland, in a caravan with six other Italians.. For some reasons I don't think we're meant to be.
Hahah.

Dokomo wonders who drank almost half of his afternoon drink with fresh raspberries

The night that passed

2008-07-31T04:00:00.006+02:00

Last night, I couldn't sleep (like every night this past week) and I snapped this photo of myself looking like Yoko Ono.
I feel comfortable enough with you to share it.
It's quite easy, really.
Sleep deprivation and no make-up, all Asians look like this sooner or later.
Too bad it happened so soon, I'm only 27 for God's sake.

Jenny.. Yoko.. Jenny? Yoko?

My last day as a free woman in Stockholm is at its end. It's 4 a.m. and I am about to hop in the shower after a long day. I desperately need to flip my sleeping hours back to normal, that's why the countryside sounds like such a good idea. 10.50 my train leaves tomorrow.

Returned the Zara shoes and feel very pleased with myself. Didn't buy the Canon camera because it was sold out everywhere for that price. I was told it will re-enter but at a higher price so now I am confused. I think I'll just wait for a while..

Relaxed in the sun with my friend Gilla and ice lattes, then we went to organize for her BBQ in her courtyard at Mariatorget.

Malin and new friend Robin. Please note Thomas being a dedicated grillmaster in the background.

We made five (yes, F-I-V-E) buckets of potato salad and everyone brought booze and BBQ stuff. I grilled salmon filets, as fish and seafood is my only vice after being a good vegetarian for almost four whole months. It was all good until Pontus showed me all his good meat. I was very jealous until he dug into it with such enthusiasm he resembled a hungry hyena tearing apart an antilope corpse.

Here Pontus actually used cutlery, for aesthetic reasons I presume

Helen and myself. Note to self; evening mode on camera doesn't work all that well..

Red Stripe was the drink for hyenas this evening. I learned how to open bottles with a lighter.
I feel very MacGyver.

Then we went to our favourite nightspot, Debaser Slussen. Crowded but oh so nice. Luke warm evening breeze, lots of people and my best friend; Apple Caipiroska.

Helen returned after a trip to the bar and announced some heavily dressed Italians looked lost over there and after 10 minutes I had them eating out of my hand. Theoretically that is.
When I say heavily dressed I mean that one actually wore a gilet stuffed with goose feathers and another one wore a fleece jacket. I was in a strappy camisole.
They were amazed at my language knowledge and we're here for a couple of days crammed into a caravan at Långholmen (I know, try to picture six Italians in a rental caravan..).

They wanted advice on where to go tomorrow and when I left I gave one (Matteo) my cell phone number so I could text them name and address to good places.

Now it's 04.28 and I am still convincing him via texts that he really SHOULDN'T come to my place in a cab and it would be a BAD IDEA for me to come and see him right now in Långholmen. Well well.
I love that crazy Mediterranean enthusiasm!

Good night peeps, see you on Sunday.

Oh, forgot. Wore these shoes instead, as the Nine West shoes most likely never will be worn.

White 60's leather pumps with python applications, second-hand

And below are the shoes I will dream of tonight, and probably every night until they are there, on my shoe shelf, for everyone to see.
Alaia, worn beautifully by Carine Roitfeld of French Vogue.
Thanks to Sartorialist.com for these pics!

Now Matteo just texted, again, saying how he will try and get up early and come meet me for coffee before my train leaves for Eskilstuna in six hours.

Drama, every minute, on this blog.
I'm kind of like an American news channel.

I will keep you posted.

Islands and cameras and not going out

2008-07-29T21:55:00.004+02:00

Today we went to the archipelago again, Nåttarö this time.

For me it was a walk down memory lane since I have been there plenty of times in my childhood. For you who don't know, I spent all my summers and many (too many) weekends sailing with my parents. Nåttarö is an island outside of Nynäshamn, and consists mainly of sand.

The beach is great and I even went for a dip again!

Panorama of the beach

We brought pasta salad and lots of fruit and spent most of the day sleeping in the sun.
What made it even better was that the sun wasn't out all the time so it was never too hot like sometimes during this past week (can't believe I just wrote that).

Melon time!

On my way home Malin texted wondering if I wanted to go out tonight.
Mixed feelings but I was up for it. Arriving home, showering, eating..
Clothes-crisis, fat-crisis.. Well..
Let's say we didn't go.
We said we'll compensate by having a blast tomorrow night when we have a BBQ and a good-bye thing to Rasmus on our schedule!

Thinking of finally wearing my unused Nine West shoes that Lina brough me from the States. I love them but can never find the right occasion to wear them!

Also contemplating buying a digital camera.
Although my cell is ok and my old one is ok, I'd really really like one for Paris. I have found a Canon Ixus for 1495:- and it's the best camera (and champagne beige as well, really pretty) and the one I'd go for.

On the other hand I really need to save up for Paris and I went for a little walk on the town with Malin yesterday and returned home with a pair of Zara shoes, a cardigan on sale (i.e. non returnable) and a Chanel-inspired jacket from Lindex.
High street shopping but for an equivalent of a Canon camera.
Oh dear.
So I'll return the shoes, that's for sure. Any advice on what to do?
Linda said to wait with the camera for a month and keep the clothes in the meantime.

Huge problems to contemplate in front of the tv tonight. Maybe I'll ask Gilla to take me camera shopping tomorrow.. Yeah.

Then off to my parent's cottage in the countryside outside of Eskilstuna Thursday. Really looking forward to getting away for a bit. If the weather is crappy I'll stay at home, painting my livingroom all white. Yup.

What are you up to?

Smelly

2008-07-27T23:13:00.002+02:00

Sometimes when I have my balcony door open this weird weird and disgusting smell enters. At first I thought the guy living here before me had had a cat pissing all over the place but now I think I have an infected house.
We most defenitely have an animal problem.
Seagulls to be precise.

Since I can hear them and see them 24/7 there's no denying they are my closest neighbours.
Since I live on the top floor of my building it's like I'm one of them many times.
I swear, one morning I will wake up understanding their random shrieks and noises! I think I live right beneath their dining place. Or, even worse, their toilet place.

Because it reeks of old fish in here now.

Lazy summer days

2008-07-27T22:40:00.005+02:00

After one week of vacation my brain has turned to goo.
All I do is eat (lots), sunbathe (lots) and drink drinks (lots).

After my three day birthday bash I have been laying low and Friday I went to Sandhamn in the Stockholm archipelago with Linda and Maria.
It was the best thing so far this summer.
Beach, sun, bath (yeah, even I went for a dip) and lazy ferry trip.
I never would've thought doing so little could make me so tired!

Next week I'm off to the cottage outside Eskilstuna.
If the weather is as nice as this and with my mother's cooking I will roll all the way home after four sleepy days of doing nothing except drink and eat.
I love this life!

With Linda at Mamas & Tapas

This is what the old people in my neighbourhood do. The Essinge Parish, the sign says.
I couldn't help but laugh when I passed by and saw all the zimmer frames neatly parked outside!

Linda on the ferry to Sandhamn

Maria and I were happy to finally arrive

The little harbour of Sandhamn

The view from the beachside. If you could see across the Baltic you'd see Åland and Finland!

I have a picture like this from Florence 2006.
For me it defines summer, I always look at it during the winter and try and remember the sweet chill of the water against my skin. Summer 2008 then, here it is.

Yesterday in Luxparken below my house Linda and I had the neighbourhood sushi that is extremely good and fresh. I got my moving in pressie (Carin-perfumed candle from By Redo) and my birthday pressie (two photos of NYC taken by Linda and enlarged). I started crying (need I add, of joy?).

Yum!

Forgot to tell you

2008-07-19T19:57:00.002+02:00

Go to

http://www.timeout.com/newyork/articles/comedy/37321/charlie-kasov

to see Charlie! He was picked by Time Out New York as Joke of the week! Yay!

I'm so proud of him!

After my heart turned cold again..

2008-07-19T19:49:00.003+02:00

..He did write me, a couple of hours ago. Not Fabri Fibra, the other italian man I just gave up hope on.

He wrote me on Facebook, like always. After two weeks of complete silence. The bastard. After saying how he didn't want to lose me a second time. The bastard. He said he was sorry for not writing sooner but he's in a bit of a down period. Yeah, well, it's too late. I can't have people showing up in my life after two years, making a mess and then leaving without a word.

Today is his birthday and all I can do is not congratulate him. It's so hard to play this game. The activity of NOT doing something, like not responding on his message, is harder than to actually just do it. Like quitting smoking. To actively choose not to do something. Gaah.

Silent time..

2008-07-18T22:39:00.004+02:00

For the first time in my life I am on paid vacation, starting Monday. Two full weeks of relax. Crazy.

These last two weeks, being responsible for all the childrens' small accessories, have been heavy but I have loved being in charge. I did it, I really did it.

Tonight is Friday night and I worked overtime two hours, went straight home and watched tv and pottered around. Now it's almost 23:00 and I am amazed that I don't have to go to bed now and get up real early tomorrow morning. It feels so sweet.

Have been on the phone with Jonna, planning the menu for Monday's dinner party. We'll go gor an Asian theme but down the wok and stir fry with classic Mojitos. Perfect.

My dear co-workers had all collected some money and threw me a surprise birthday this afternoon. They had bought me a bottle of red wine in a bottle shaped as the Pisa tower, vanilla/ raspberry cheesecake and made a card with Italian bare chested men. It was so sweet, I think they seem to know me pretty well by now.

Will have to go around the city looking for Asian cooking ingredients tomorrow, plus return my beautiful old red phone that I found at a second-hand store. Since my phone company does not support old phones it doesn't work with my land line. Absurd but true.

Monday I turn old. 27. Can't wait to get to 30. God knows where I'll be!

Good night.

For those of you who wonder..

2008-07-17T23:14:00.002+02:00

..He hasn't replied yet. Buhu.

And I'm almost drunk on Leva Rosé wine. Alone. Buhu again.

Pick up, I know you're there..

2008-07-15T22:05:00.006+02:00

My friend just texted me what supposedly is Fabri Fibra's cell phone number. He was on Mtv and he gave it out and she got on the phone and texted it to me.

Now let's see if he responds. I texted him, inviting him to Stockholm. Why bother playing hard-to-get when all I want is to have him in my bed-NOW.

The worst thing that could happen is probably if Mario, Luigi, Fabio, Marcello, Massimo, Leonardo etc from the Mtv backstage crew calls me from Arlanda tomorrow.. Whatever. At least they're italian.

"..Yes hi, you said I could stop by anytime..?"

Walk tall.. Or baby don't walk at all..

2008-07-14T21:42:00.002+02:00

I found a live version for you. Enjoy.

It's filmed off a concert screen in New Jersey in 1999, and the colours are a bit off. Don't think that will bother you much though.

Soulsinging

2008-07-14T20:42:00.006+02:00

This song makes me want to cry. I discovered it last night and I can't get enough. Won't get enough.

It makes me want to cry, but if I cry this song will have lost its beauty and it will only be sad.

I didn't know my feelings could be made into notes and sung so beautifully, by anyone. The lyrics may be weird but the arrangement is mindblowing.

In the end it all makes total sense. This is what it's like.

--

Billy he's down by the railroad tracks
Sittin' low in the back seat of his Cadillac
Diamond Jackie, she's so intact
As she falls so softly beneath him
Jackie's heels are stacked
Billy's got cleats on his boots
Together they're gonna boogaloo down Broadway and come back home with the loot
It's midnight in Manhattan, this is no time to get cute
It's a mad dog's promenade
So walk tall or baby don't walk at all

Fish lady, oh fish lady
She baits them tenement walls
She won't take corner boys
They ain't got no money
And they're so easy
I said "Hey, baby
Won't you take my hand
Walk with me down Broadway
Well mama take my arm and move with me down Broadway"
I'm a young man, I talk it real loud
Yeah babe I walk it real proud for you
Ah so shake it away
So shake away your street life
Shake away your city life
Hook up to the train
And hook up to the night train
Hook it up
Hook up to the train
But I know that she won't take the train, no she won't take the train
Oh she won't take the train, no she won't take the train
Oh she won't take the train, no she won't take the train
Oh she won't take the train, no she won't take the train
She's afraid them tracks are gonna slow her down
And when she turns this boy'll be gone
So long, sometimes you just gotta walk on, walk on

Hey vibes man, hey jazz man, play me your serenade
Any deeper blue and you're playin' in your grave
Save your notes, don't spend 'em on the blues boy
Save your notes, don't spend 'em on the darlin' yearlin' sharp boy
Straight for the church note ringin', vibes man sting a trash can
Listen to your junk man
Listen to your junk man
Listen to your junk man
He's singin', he's singin', he's singin'
All dressed up in satin, walkin' past the alley
He's singin', singin', singin', singin'

The agony of aging

2008-07-14T00:04:00.007+02:00

My best friend is the best friend ever.

When I was a little sad not to celebrate my birthday in Florence as usual she asked, "what's so great with celebrating in Florence?". "Well" I replied, "for instance we celebrated three nights in a row".
"We can do that here too" she said. "No", I said. "Yes, of course" she said and that's it.
We will now, this year, celebrate my birthday for three nights.
Next Sunday, Monday and Tuesday.
Tuesday will be the big party night since most of us are off Wednesday.
I am already looking a little bit more forward to turning 27.

Today she texted me, asking if I am allergic to almonds (since I am allergic to many nuts).
I think she might be up to something.. Almond cake?
Hmm. We'll see.

Stockholm summer

2008-07-12T12:43:00.004+02:00

Outside Philipp's and Kelly's leaving party at Morfar Ginko at Södermalm, this green car crashed in to a parked car. The driver stepped out of the car, put his sunglasses on and started running. Weird. Then the car stood there for like an hour before the police came. I think the bar staff actually called the press instead of the police, the crowd was huge and it was probably good PR. When the poor owner of the black Chevrolet arrived he called the police and then they towed the car.

As far as I know the guy is still running!

Sandra, Philipp and Rasmus

Impatiently awaiting arrival of digital box for my TV. Have signed up for cable and 8 extra channels as Discovery Travel and Food, Rai 2 and Cartoon Networks. Below is my favourite mad scientist, Dexter.

Somwhere in Tantolunden, Södermalm, someone had too many beers and good time on their hands.

Thomas and Jåni at Debaser, last weekend. They borrowed my phone and when I got it back this was on my screen. Very nice.

Heartbroken

2008-07-12T00:30:00.008+02:00

So many things can make me sad.

Rinht now it's listening to "Irreplaceable" with Beyoncé. It brings back such memories of Borås (yes, always the same damn town) and a certain boy that we called Pedro. He was the one person that "got away" since I've grown old. He was the love of my adult life. He was everything I thought I'd ever wanted, no more. He was everything I DIDN'T KNOW I wanted. For a while he was all I needed. I breathed this existence, if that makes sense. When he'd been in my bed I never wanted to change sheets. I wanted to inhale him for the rest of my life, that's how in love I was. Or thought I was, since it didn't last.

He moved on and I was alone again. That's where the madness started for me. Not because of him, but after him.

And I hate being so melancholic, I hate it.

I saw my friends today after work and we touched the subject, my melancholy. And then the brain takes off.. Why I'm never happy, I'm always going places.. I just want to find my way home. And I don't know where that is.

Home is where the heart is, as my tattoo symbolizes. Well, my heart is growing colder and colder.

Whenever I feel this way I listen to (I know it's cheesy, don't tell me) The Killers "Read my mind". It makes me remember how badly I want to leave and that there's more to life than this. That I can always take off again. That I'm better than this. That there's more to life than this.

No one seems to understand that my settling down here is a step closer to leaving.

Number mumbo jumbo

2008-07-09T21:14:00.002+02:00

This is bloody silly. After hesitating for a month and a half I finally resigned (having seen the amount of my cell phone bill) and applied for a home phone and cable tv.

Tried to register online yesterday (before getting depressed and over-annoyed and cranky and writing suicidal bitter post, see below) and it didn't work out. Four times it didn't work out.

Tried to call this morning. 23 mins waiting. F**k that.

Tried to register online this evening. Same shit.

Tried to call this evening. 7 mins waiting. Ok.

When I finally got through I spoke to the least enthusiastic person ever. He merely replied to my questions and seemed incredibly tired of speaking to charming customers prepared to pay more of their tiny salaries to this multibillion nationwide company. I got pissed off, hung up with a promise that it would be ok and that I'd try again online.

I tried again online, thinking that at least I had surly guy's name in case I'd register wrongly or something. But it worked and I signed up for cable tv and home phone. Cable and 8 extra channels that I could pick myself. So, weird mix of cartoons, fashion, italian and cooking/ travel. Yup. That's just me. Sweet.

After having electronically signed and agreed and feeling lucky and happy I suddenly remebered I have no home phone NUMBER.

So I had to sit for 6 mins in waiting line on support phone, again, since evil nationwide company doesn't mention anything about it on homepage.

When finally there again, guess what. Grouchy guy again. What are the odds.

And he checked for me and, "yes, phone number was included, you get to choose between a few". "No", I said, "I didn't get to choose". "Ah", he said, "your phone number is..." and he gave me the longest, stupidest number ever. It's like a cell phone and it makes no sense at all. Like 08-39850728197643.. You get the picture. And I didn't get to pick it myself, I'd do my best to find the most logical number. So I'm stuck with this silly one.

No one will call me now.

To make myself a little more happy I will go to thrift shops tomorrow after work and try and find old retro ugly phone with horrible ringtone. Dialog they are called, and I want a red, black or white one. Then I will stay in, watching Italian tv (Rai Due, basically Friends and 2½men all dubbed), calling people and cooking after tv-show recipies on Discovery Food & Travel.

Pop over with a good bottle of wine if you please.

The things I hate..

2008-07-08T23:55:00.006+02:00

Jag skriver det här på svenska, så att nyfikna ögon inte ska förstå..

Jag HATAR att jag aldrig är lycklig där jag är, utan saknar där jag var eller längtar dit jag ska
Jag HATAR att jag blir otålig och rastlös när jag är ensam
Jag HATAR att jag inte vet vem jag kan ringa när jag inte kan sova
Jag HATAR att jag egentligen tycker om att vara singel men glömmer det titt som tätt
Jag HATAR att så många av mina vänner inte tror att de duger, eller att de mäter sitt värde i mäns uppskattning
Jag HATAR att redan ha åldersnoja trots att jag precis blivit vuxen
Jag HATAR att jag börjar tvivla på mig själv och min kompetens i främmande situationer
Jag HATAR att jag, efter bara två långa Facebook-meddelanden, redan fantiserat ihop ett gemensamt liv för oss två och loggar in flera gånger om dagen för att se om han skrivit
Jag HATAR att köper skor jag inte behöver för mina SL-kortpengar
Jag HATAR att jag fortfarande är ledsen efter Boråstiden (kommer det nånsin kännas bra?) och ledsen för att jag inte kan förlåta er, det måste bli bra snart, det måste
Jag HATAR att jag är tillbaka i Stockholm men fortfarande känner mig ensam
Jag HATAR att jag saknar Florens så det gör ont, varje dag
Jag HATAR att jag slutat drömma på nätterna
Jag HATAR att jag saknar min bästa vän men inte vågar säga det för jag vet inte vad svaret skulle bli
Jag HATAR att ingenting inspirerar mig längre

Late night thoughts

2008-07-06T23:38:00.004+02:00

Today I was having coffee with close friends. It was a lazy day in the sun, a bit slow since we were out last night at Ljunggrens and Debaser .
No eventful evening of any sort, just general people spotting and drinking.
Lots of beautiful people out but no one for me.

It bores me, trying to find that perfect one in a bar in midst of a thousand others. Everyone so self occupied and self aware.. Me, of course, one of them, I'm not saying I'm any better. But, I mean, if you do end up with someone, talking the night away, then what? Morning comes and the beauty and excitement from last night fades away. How could we possibly meet "the one" in a crowded bar, alcohol involved, loud music playing? The meat market has never felt so cheap, so close and yet so distant.

When we were sunbathing by the water outside my house Saturday, two guys in their late 20's came and lay down close to us and started chatting with each other.
We couldn't help but overhear their conversation, also because they were talking pretty loudly. One was pretty normal looking and one a little better looking. Number one never really said that much, mostly it was number two doing all the talking. They chatted away about girls and clubs and last night and so on. Then number two said, stating what he apparently thought was an obvious thing;
"It's much better to go for the ugly ones, it's much easier".
I was so provoked, not so much for him being a complete asshole and all, but for how he could live with himself always sleeping with girls he finds ugly? I have a suspicion he has never been in love. So, that also added to my somewhat jaded excitement of meeting someone out in a bar.
It's ugly, the Swedish meat market.

I did meet a couple of french Canadians, they were much fun to talk to. I wish I had been better with my french, it could've been cool to speak some.

Speaking of France, tomorrow Jonna is booking the tickets for Paris! I am thrilled, we'll be away for a long weekend in the end of August and we only want to go to stores, take long walks, eat good food and drink good wine! Since I was there recently and Jonna's been there too, there is no need to go sightseeing and since we're both old ladies we don't look for cool clubs and fancy discos.. It'll be great.

Will go to bed soon. I have spent this Sunday evening on the couch, watching the first season of Californication and doing laundry. Now I have wet laundry drying all over the place and no bed sheets.. Shit. These next two weeks will be heavy since my buyer is off on vacation and I am left alone with all. Thrilled but nervous. Good thing there is no more bus strike, it made my mornings so hectic!

I have to get my head around this whole love thing.
I know so many of my friends are looking actively for it, longing to find The One.
I also want to find The One, settle down and make babies for the rest of my life, but at the same time I am so happy with being on my own, deciding every little thing on my own! Am I the unnormal one?
Should I feel stressed and unhappy and half since I am alone (bullshit, I am surrounded by good people) or should I be satisfied and a little snug since I am satisfied like this? AM I SATISIFIED LIKE THIS? I don't know. The loneliness and the restlessness creeps up on me when I least expect it but I don't suffer from it the way I see so many others do.

I think in time all of that love stuff will come. No stress, just making the best out of these years that supposedly are the best of our lives.
I know I'm a good girl, I know I'll get to that place later in life.
It does work out for the best, and I know that there are happy endings.

When I meet him, I hope I'll just know.

Nighty night.

The update

2008-06-24T21:48:00.008+02:00

Hi everyone...

Now it's photo time like I promised!

I saw a friend of mine today after work and she nagged me for never updating this page and told me I was the worst blogger ever and yes, I know I am, and I apologize.

I've had way too much to do, I'm not even on Facebook anymore.

Ok, so, first.. The apartment:

Here you enter. My hallway with shoes, only my favourite high heels could fit.
It indeed is a small hallway.

The bathroom.
New cabinet with the surgical light beaming, fresh and clean.
A shame I will never take baths in my bathtub though.

The hallway seen from bathroom.
Between the two closets is the kitchen but it's very messy at the moment..

The livingroom seen from the bathroom/hallway.
Still nothing on the walls since I move the furniture around every week.
Will also splurge on a flatscreen TV soon, and get the cable up and running.
Tomorrow trip to IKEA for curtains! Behind the side of the couch is the bedroom.

Bedroom, tiny but my calm and peace. The roller curtain does not protect from morning sunshine but I kinda llike to wake up and see the blue sky (whenever that actually happens)..
Do you recognize the photo in the window..?

The livingroom seen from the windows.
On the left is bedroom. On the right the dining table..
Anton Corbijn-photos still not hung, standing on piles of BON magazine.
Well. My home, my everything.

The view from my window, 10 mins ago. Sun setting over the city. Nice with waterfront view although the house is not so protected from the weather.
When it's windy I think the roof is going to fly off the walls!

When I was shopping around for furniture I went to a local little fleamarket close to my parents' house and found loads of cool stuff. Like this:

Kind of Art Deco-ish lamp, in black and gold metal, with silver metal lining on top.
I loved it but thought it would be too edgy in my flat.

Imagine to get this chair and redress it in Joseph Frank or maybe black linen..
Nowhere to put it unfortunately.

I also went out to see my friends DJ at Fredsgatan 12. I love the colours they project on the walls, like:

I went to the Sex and the City opening!

I saw this funny ad (below) for a wristwatch company and thought of my American friend..
Whose Blackberry I've wanted to throw in the Seine many times. That means he's NOT their target customer.

I had my moving-in party. Here Rasmus and my loveliest Jonna:

Midsummer passed silently and quietly with picknick in a local park.
Since it started raining we headed home to my place and we ended up staying there the entire evening, although we'd planned to go out.
The morning after I enjoyed the morning sunshine on the rooftop terrace, overlooking the City.

And now..

The BIG question:

I just found this ACNE-dress and I think I like it.

The colour is terracotta (although in the photos it looks more apricot which it isn't) and quite hard to pull off without looking like a greenish corpse (I hate olive skin) and the style is kinda puffy.

But I really think I like it.

I can return it within five days and get my money back, what do you think??

It has pockets hidden in the sideseams and one thigh-high cut on one side.

Please, I rely on you for comments.

..Posing...

..Gaah, I hate posing... So please make it worthwile by leaving a comment!